Dad-Love

With increased awareness of my gluten intolerance, eating out has become increasingly difficult. Eating at my friends' and families' homes is almost worse - I don't want to be a pain and would rather not eat than make difficulty for those I love, but of course, they want to feed me.

I was so impressed with my Dad yesterday; he prepared a gluten-free (for me) and a nut-free (for my sister) meal that was absolutley delicious and enjoyed by everyone at the table, regardless of their eating habits, allergies or intolerances. He scoured the cupboards for a delicious tortilla soup, made with 100% corn chips, he prepared Beef Chow Fun (Rice noodles with beef) despite the fact that I forgot to bring him gluten-free soya sauce AND he made a delicious steamed halibut dish, again without the aid of soya sauce.

I have promised to get him his own bottle of Tamari (the gluten-free soya sauce - it is richer, fuller flavour and uses corn alcohol rather than wheat during fermentation) this week, and I've already dropped off bags of rice flour (regular and glutinous) so that he can bread meats or thicken sauces to his hearts content, when he knows I'll be coming over.

I'm so proud of him and appreciate his efforts fully - it was definitley a challenge for him, but he persevered and I left the table well-fed and sans-stomach ache! I guess after watching me suffer through a vacation of unknown foods, he was happy to provide me with some delicious grub. THANKS DAD - your the BEST!

siblings

It's curious, I'm not sure where it came from, but I was driving along today and had a bizarre realization. My dad is a "because I said so" parent, and though many things have changed over the years, I know that his attitude was consistent throughout both my own and my siblings upbringing. And despite this, or perhaps more likely as a result of this attitude, all three of us have a problem with authority, especially being expected to blindly follow instructions without explanation, rhyme or reason.

My sister is the baby and the princess, and she knows how to work it. She pours on the charm, looks you straight in the eye and tells you how SHE wants things to be when confronted with unexplained authority.

My brother has the strength & resiliency of steel, which will forever amaze and inspire me. If you don't respect him, you can expect less than nothing from him and he will take your punishment without question.

Myself, I am the weakest in this respect. I am the oldest and I strive for a harmony that comes with taking care of others. If a request is reasonable, if it is spoken to me with respect, if I can understand the need I will agree. However, if I feel taken advantage of, or disrespected I WILL stand up for myself.

Perhaps the truth is that none of this has to do with the "because I told you so" parenting style we encountered but rather is just the natural trend of our family: strong willed and persistent. I really don't know what the answer is, but I certainly found the idea to be extremely ironic.